We have come so far and have so far to go...

As I mentioned in my first post, Thomas had his CI surgery recently -- on June 29th to be exact. As you can see from the picture to the right, he looked like he had a large tumor removed, not a CI implanted! While I would love to tell you that he immediately bounced back following surgery, that would be a total lie. He had about 4 days that were filled with whining, restless nights and questionable eating patterns. All in all though, it was okay...not great, just okay. Would I do it again? Yes, if it would mean that Thomas could hear even better than having one CI alone...no, if we can keep the one relatively good hearing ear that we have right now with his left ear being moderately severe to mild.

So you might ask yourself right now, why in the heck is this crazy woman writing today about a surgery that happened 3 weeks ago. Well, we will be activated this coming Monday. Like most parents, we are fearful that Thomas "won't accept the CI" and won't learn to truly listen and speak. We have seen such an improvement in his babble, expressive language and understanding since we took the hearing aid off the right ear, following surgery. He is picking up new consonant and vowel combinations, he is saying "hi" and "bye" again, giving word approximations for "up" and "down" again, he even on Friday of last week did the clap for Mr. crocodile in "Five Little Monkeys" and it was the first time that we really worked on the sentences at home.

His audiologist and AVT agree that his right aid was probably providing too much distortion for Thomas to truly understand language -- one of the reasons we moved forward with the CI. So now, I'm scared that he will take huge steps back AGAIN in his auditory verbal skills because his brain will have to learn a new signal or way of listening. Now I fear that his "good hearing ear" will distort the sound being received by the CI. What if his hearing improves again in his left ear to moderate to mild? Does that impact how his brain understands the CI??...so, I worry.

I realize that it is our job as parents to worry about our children -- no matter if our children have special needs or not. Worrying is something that I do best (ask my husband :-) Worry keeps me up at night and wakes me early in the morning.

I worry because Thomas works so hard every single day to listen and speak...he has fought so hard to deal with fluctuations in his hearing, he has come so far with the hearing aid technology we've been able to give him...and yet I worry because he still has so far to go...